I have to write. It's not that I want to, although I suspect it will provide a place to deposit certain thoughts that tend to occupy my mind, thereby allowing me to let go of them (at least for a time), and provide some increased peace of mind. I have to write in order to create a habit. If I'm ever to be done with my dissertation and move on to new projects, I have to cultivate a consistent daily practice.

However, and here's the rub, I hate writing. I think I'm deeply scared of it. I'm scared of the judgments people will inevitably make. I'm scared of not living up to some blurry conceptions I have of myself. I'm scared to finally put some of my ideas to the test and find that they, or my expression of them, is lacking.

So, nothing to see here. You might as well move along to another blog and stop reading now. The rest will be interesting only to me. If you keep reading and you don't like it, you have only yourself to blame.
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Maybe this will provide a way to get the words flowing. Maybe this will provide a way to become more comfortable with the idea others reading my work. Maybe this will lift the mental fog that blows in every time I sit down and try to write academic prose... Or, maybe this is just another distraction. Time will tell.